


Mooning over him

by Tunturikettu



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Era, Confused Merlin (Merlin), Conversations, Friendship/Love, Jealous Arthur, M/M, Season 3 AU, Secrets, Slow Burn, UST, flirty Gwaine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-13 05:30:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19244803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tunturikettu/pseuds/Tunturikettu
Summary: Season 3 AU: Gwaine is brought to Camelot after saving Arthur’s life in the tavern, but the incident with the mele never happens, so he stays in Camelot. Soon he starts flirting with Merlin, which doesn’t please Arthur. Merlin is not sure what to think of the situation.





	Mooning over him

**Author's Note:**

> My second fan fic. What I hope had happened in season 3 instead of bullying etc.

Merlin never really liked taverns before, but after Gwaine arrived and became this new exciting friend of his, he found himself there more and more. Gwaine was funny and interesting and, unlike his other friends, he had travelled widely, so he had lots of stories and jokes to tell. There was also another way he was different. Merlin had noticed that he seemed to check out both women and men arriving at the tavern, so it wasn’t a huge surprise, when Gwaine admitted that he had had all sorts of relationships in the past.

They were sipping ale in the half-empty tavern.  
“Soo, have you been courting any girls, Merlin?” Gwaine asked casually.  
“Umm, no, not really. There was this one girl, but she…she went away.” It was too complicated and painful to tell what had really happened to Freya.  
“Oh, I’m sorry. That’s happened to me many times.” Gwaine looked thoughtful and then went on. “I’ve had things going on with lots of people, but none has lasted for long. Most of them were women, but a few were men.” Gwaine stared at Merlin intently. “Are you shocked?”  
“Umm, no. I know some people do that”, Merlin said uncertainly avoiding Gwaine’s eyes. He didn’t like where this discussion was heading.  
Gwaine moved a bit closer and lowered his voice saying: “But you are not one of them?”  
Suddenly Merlin felt hot. “No! Definitely not! It’s forbidden!” he exclaimed and backed off a bit. There was no chance he would talk about his feelings with Gwaine. It would be way too dangerous and embarrassing.  
“Calm down, Merlin. I’m not accusing you of anything. I’m just saying that I’m someone who’d understand completely if you had secret thoughts of someone”, Gwaine said reassuringly. “Like for example the Prince. You seem to like him a lot.”  
Now Merlin was shocked. How could Gwaine have noticed? It was a fact that he and Arthur had become closer recently, but he had payed extra attention to acting as professionally as he could whenever they were in public.  
“It’s not like that. I like him as my employer, that’s all. There’s nothing secret about it!” he tried to say as firmly as possible.  
“Okay, whatever you say”, Gwaine said with a knowing smile. Merlin sighed. He had a feeling that nothing he said could change the impression Gwaine had got.

Gwaine was often too quick to come to conclusions, but this time he was absolutely right. Merlin had loads of secret thoughts about the Prince. Merlin suspected that Arthur had secret thoughts about him too, because occasionally the Prince seemed almost flirtatious and sometimes he was uncharacteristically affectionate towards him. Merlin flirted lightly back, but neither of them had never crossed the line of saying or doing something that could be clearly interpreted as something beyond friendship. It seemed that they never would, because they both knew a relationship was out of the question. Gwaine, however, was ready to mix things up.

***

After their conversation Merlin started to notice that Gwaine stared at him longer than was usual and used every opportunity to put his hand around his shoulders or pat his back. It seemed that he had become more interesting in Gwaine’s eyes than before. Merlin didn’t know what to think. It was at the same time both uncomfortable and flattering. After one of their visits to the tavern Gwaine insisted that they go to the battlements. Merlin didn’t think it was good idea, because Gwaine was pretty drunk, but in the end he agreed. 

They were standing in the brisk night air and Merlin had his arm around Gwaine to keep him stable.  
“The stars are bright this evening”, Merlin said staring at the clear sky.  
“Yeah, like your eyes”, Gwaine mumbled.  
“What!?”  
“You have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen! I could stare into them for hours”, Gwaine went on smiling and turned his head to look at Merlin, who couldn’t believe what he had heard.  
“Gwaine…. you’re drunk!”  
“Yeah, but it’s the truth! I’ve dated lots of people, but now I think I’ve finally found the right one! Have you?” Gwaine continued and leaned closer.  
“Ummm…” , was all that Merlin managed to say. He had no idea how to respond to this.  
“I’ve been thinking bout you, Merlin. Lots and lots of thinking. Have you been thinking about me?” Now Gwaine was slurring more and Merlin thought it was pointless to go on.  
“Please, can we discuss this tomorrow! When you’re back into your senses!”  
“But I…”  
“It’s late, let’s go”, Merlin said firmly and dragged Gwaine away.  
“Heey, I wanna stay….”

***

Merlin was doing some errands for Gaius, when he saw Gwaine who was taking a break from helping the blacksmith. He thought it was best to sort things out so he approached him.  
“Hello!”  
“Ah, hello Merlin!” Gwaine answered with a wide smile.  
“So….do you remember anything about last night?” Merlin asked tentatively and sat on the bench next to his friend.  
Gwaine took a moment looking almost uncertain before answering: “I do. You were right that I was drunk, but I wasn’t that drunk. I remember everything.”  
“Oh.” Merlin was disappointed. He had hoped that Gwaine had just talked some drunken nonsense and they wouldn’t have to go back to it.  
“And I meant what I said”, Gwaine said seriously staring Merlin into the eye.  
“Really? You’re serious?”  
“Yes. I really have been thinking about you a lot lately. How about you?”  
Wow, this is going to be awkward, Merlin thought. “Umm… I like you a lot, Gwaine, but like I said I’m really not that kind of a guy…”  
“Who fancies men?” Gwaine completed with a low voice.  
“Yeah.”  
“Well, that’s just utter nonsense. I’ve seen how you look at Arthur.”  
“What?” Merlin had been staring to the distance, but now his eyes darted straight to Gwaine.  
“If that’s not love I don’t know what is. But you can never have him. I haven’t yet figured it out if he feels the same about you, he’s not as obvious as you, but it doesn’t matter, because in that position he’ll never dare start a relationship like that. You must understand that?”  
During Gwaine’s talk Merlin panicked a little. He was alarmed that Gwaine had figured out something so personal about him and even given thought to the matter. What did he mean by him being obvious? And what if he would tell someone? “Yes, I know”, he managed to say weakly after a deep breath.”I wouldn’t dream of it.” Gwaine raised his eyebrows.  
“Well, that’s a lie. But anyway, we are free, you and me. We can do whatever we want, we are not under scrutiny. I know you like me. You really don’t want to moon over the Prince the rest of your life when you could be having a real relationship. Believe me.”  
“I am not mooning over him!”  
Gwaine gave him a patronizing smile. “Yes you are! But it’s useless so you’d better stop it. So, what do you say, you and me?”  
Merlin backed off when Gwaine leaned closer and winked at him. “Gwaine, no….I don’t think of you like that. You are my friend.”  
“Well, it could change”, Gwaine said carefreely and shrugged. “But, you’re not disgusted by the idea?”  
“Umm, no, you are wonderful and all, but really, we’ll be better off as friends.”  
“Let’s see what happens”, Gwaine smirked and patted him on the back.  
“Nothing will happen!” Merlin said strictly, but couldn’t help but add: “But did you honestly mean everything you said last night?”  
“Yeah. Every word!” Gwaine exclaimed earnestly.  
“The stuff you said about my eyes?” Merlin asked shyly. His appearance was rarely, if ever, complimented.  
“Hah, you’re interested after all!” Gwaine laughed and whipped his hair. Then he pretended to be thoughtful. “Hmm, now when I think about it I may have exaggerated a bit. I used to have a Spaniel who had prettier eyes. But yours are definitely in the top five!” he said and grinned making Merlin smile too.

***

Arthur was having a break from the practice with his knights. He could hear Gwaine laughing on the other side of the practice field. The man had now turned up three days in a row to watch the practice with Merlin and it made Arthur annoyed seeing him there again. He didn’t like extra people hanging around. Merlin didn’t seem to mind though. He and Gwaine had obviously become good friends as Arthur had lately seen them together quite frequently. 

Merlin came over with a water skin and handed it to Arthur.  
“What’s Gwaine doing here?” Arthur asked after taking a few gulps.  
“I think he’s trying to learn a thing or two.”  
“Looks to me that he’s just following you around”, Arthur said raising his eyebrow. It was true that Gwaine seemed to be interested in weapons and fighting, but it was clear that Merlin interested him even more.  
“Umm... maybe that too”, Merlin admitted sheepishly.  
“You should tell him to stop bothering you. I don’t like him stalking you”, Arthur said scowling.  
“Oh? Why does it matter to you?” Merlin asked feigning innocence.  
“Well…umm, I am the only one who can stalk you”, Arthur said failing to come up with anything rational.  
“Oh really? I wasn’t aware of that”, Merlin smirked. Arthur just muttered something, took his sword and left.

Merlin watched him go feeling a warm wave go through him. The Prince seemed to be jealous and that meant he cared for him. 

***

The sun shone through the windows of the Throne Room making the knights’ capes shine brightly. It was yet another knighting ceremony, but the first one that Gwaine attended. As he had now and then helped around in the castle, he was allowed to watch the ceremony from the side with the servants. Most people stared at King Uther who was giving a boring speech, but Merlin’s and Gwaine’s eyes were fixed to Arthur, whose hair glowed golden in the sunshine and posture was as dignified as it could be. 

“Mmm, I now understand why you have fallen for your Prince”, Gwaine whispered glancing at Merlin who stared at Arthur with a small proud smile on his lips.  
“Keep quiet!” Merlin whispered back.  
“He looks smoking hot! Shame he has so much clothes on.”  
“Shut up, will you!” Merlin said swallowing his urge to laugh. Part of him was terrified that Gwaine talked like that in public, even though he was whispering, but other part was fascinated to hear thoughts, he had used to bury as deep as he could, uttered so freely.  
“If he was a commoner, I’d start chasing after him myself”, Gwaine continued grinning. “Though I’d still choose you.”  
“Oh, stop it!” Merlin answered shoving him lightly. Gwaine just had to shove him back and Merlin sidestepped. Arthur’s gaze turned to them and he raised his eyebrow slightly. Merlin smiled back innocently thinking that this was the last time he’d agree standing next to Gwaine on such occasion.

On the same night Gwaine dragged Merlin to the tavern again. It was Merlin’s night off so he had gotten himself slightly drunk in the feast before. Now Gwaine ordered them a few rounds which didn’t seem to affect him at all, but made Merlin wobbly and giggle. Gwaine was delighted to notice that Merlin was giving him warm smiles and didn’t seem bothered, when Gwaine ruffled his hair and kept his feet pressed to Merlin’s under the table.

“Maybe we should go out to clear your head a bit?” Gwaine asked after Merlin had almost fallen off his chair.  
“Heheh, maybe!”  
Gwaine put his arm around Merlin’s shoulder and led him towards the castle. The cold gust of wind made them find shelter near the wall. Gwaine turned to look at his friend’s elegant profile which glowed in the torch light. It’s now or never he thought and stroked Merlin’s upper back with his strong fingers.  
“Have you made your decision?” he asked.  
“What?” Merlin slurred.  
“If you’re ready for, you know, you and me?”  
“I didn’t know I was making a decision”, Merlin answered tantalizingly.  
“You are”, Gwaine said in a low voice and pressed himself to Merlin and started kissing his ear and cheek. Merlin laughed nervously and turned his head to avoid Gwaine reaching his mouth. Gwaine stepped in front of Merlin and quickly leaned in till their noses touched. Their lips had time to crash together shortly before Merlin turned his head and put it on Gwaine’s shoulder hugging him. Impatient as Gwaine was, he was not content with just this and kissed Merlin’s neck. Then he slid his hands downwards on Merlin’s back and even rubbed himself against Merlin a bit.  
This had the opposite effect Gwaine had hoped for. Merlin awoke from his happy haze and got a grip of his rational thoughts. “No, stop it”, he said weakly and stepped back from Gwaine.  
“Why, what’s wrong?” Gwaine asked letting his arms drop. “We are meant to be!”  
“No. Good night, Gwaine”, Merlin just said and turned and left. Gwaine looked at his swaying figure disappearing into the darkness and cursed that he had rushed things.

***

The next afternoon Gwaine went to see Merlin. He knocked on the door and Gaius opened it.  
“Hey, Gaius. Is Merlin here?”  
“Hello. Yes, come in.”  
Merlin was finishing his meal and turned to look at Gwaine blankly.  
“Hi.”  
“I’d like to talk to you”, Gwaine said gently and was glad that Gaius was busy searching for something from the shelf.  
“Mmm”, Merlin mumbled and took a sip of water before heading for his room gesturing Gwaine to follow.  
“Are you angry with me?” Gwaine asked after shutting the door to Merlin’s plain room.  
“Yes”, Merlin said and sat on the bed. “You shouldn’t have done what you did last night. I was drunk and you took advantage of that.”  
“Um, but we didn’t actually do anything!” Gwaine said carefreely, but changed his tone after Merlin glared at him. “You seemed willing enough.”  
“That was because I was out of my senses. I should’ve been more careful.”  
“Why do you always have to think so much? Why can’t you just do what feels good?”  
“Cause I’m not like that!” Merlin said pointedly. “I’m not going to mess around with people if I’m not serious with them.”  
“But I want you to be serious with me, we’d be great together!”  
“I’ve already told that I don’t think of you like that.”  
“If you’d give me a chance, it could change.” Gwaine sat next to Merlin and gave him a pleading look.  
“I can’t imagine that happening”, Merlin said stiffly.  
“It’s because of Arthur, isn’t it? You love him.”  
“Shh, keep your voice down”, Merlin said quickly and glanced at the door.  
“I’m sure Gaius already knows how you feel about Arthur”, Gwaine said smiling and patted Merlin on the arm. Merlin opened his mouth to object, but changed his mind. “Maybe, but I really don’t want to discuss it with him. Like I shouldn’t be discussing it with you either. If anyone found out, I’d be hanged or at least exiled. Same would happen to you if someone had seen what happened yesterday.”  
Gwaine just rolled his eyes.“You don’t want to be hiding for the rest of your life!”  
Merlin stared at his hands. If only Gwaine knew that this wasn’t the only thing he had to hide.  
“I won’t be endangering my position by Arthur’s side anymore than I already have. You must keep quiet about this!” he said and stared at Gwaine as sternly as he could.  
“You are ready to stay with him? Even when one day he’ll get married and you’ll have to watch him with some woman?”  
“I’ll always stay by Arthur, no matter what. Him getting married doesn’t change anything! It’s my duty to serve him and help him to become the greatest king this land has ever known!” Merlin said with such fervor in his voice that Gwaine turned to look at him with a surprised expression. ”Right”, he then said slowly, astonished that Merlin’s devotion to the young Prince ran so deep. He finally realized that it was best to give up. Nothing would make Merlin forget about Arthur.  
“And you must stop bothering me”, Merlin continued. “What we did last night was a huge mistake and it won’t happen again.”  
“If that’s what you want”, Gwaine said with resignation even though he wanted to roll his eyes at Merlin’s choice of words.  
They sat in an awkward silence for a while. “We can still be friends though”, Merlin finally said and smiled tentatively.”If you want?”  
“Of course! I wouldn’t let a thing like this ruin it!” Gwaine laughed and squeezed him quickly. Merlin grinned and all the tension between them was washed away. 

***

Arthur stomped angrily into Gaius’ chambers through the slightly open door. “Where’s Merlin?” he asked the Physician.  
“In his room”, Gaius said absently. “But I don’t think he wants to be disturbed….”, he added when he remembered that Gwaine was there, but Arthur had already gone up the stairs.

Arthur opened Merlin’s door forcefully and saw his manservant and Gwaine sitting on the bed in the middle of some vivid conversation. Merlin startled and moved further from Gwaine.“Oh, hello!”  
“Uh, good day Sire!” Gwaine said trying to sound casual.  
“Please go. I’d like to speak to my manservant”, Arthur said sharply. He stared icily at Gwaine who didn’t move, but just stared back. Merlin fidgeted nervously feeling the tension in the room rise. “Of course”, Gwaine finally said, stood up and left. 

Arthur’s arrival had been so unexpected that it wasn’t until that point when Merlin realized how rude Arthur had been.  
“You can’t just walk into my room when it’s my time off and order my friend away!” he snapped standing up.  
“What’s going on between you and Gwaine?” Arthur asked ignoring Merlin’s comment completely and forgetting his initial reason for seeking Merlin out.  
“What do you mean?”  
“He’s been circling you for some time and now this!”  
“This?”  
“There was clearly something suspicious going on when I came in”, Arthur said sternly and started to pace around.  
“Suspicious?! We were sitting and talking! Like I said, he’s my friend.”  
“Oh, I’m telling you he wants to be more than a friend! It’s inappropriate!”  
“Are you going to fire me then?” Merlin asked annoyed crossing his arms.  
Arthur stopped and looked at him like he was crazy. “What are you talking about? Of course not.”  
Merlin sat back on the bed and glanced at Arthur. “Why does Gwaine bother you so much?  
“Ummm…” It was Arthur’s turn to fidget. ”Well…. he distracts you from your work. And he isn’t good for you.”  
“What do you mean he isn’t good for me? What if he makes me happy?” Merlin asked with a confrontational tone. He knew he was taking a risk. If he had interpreted Arthur’s behavior wrong, he’d be in trouble.  
Arthur froze and his expression changed into something vulnerable. “Does he?” he then asked fixing his eyes to Merlin’s.  
Merlin sighed with relief. “No, not in that way. He’s a dear friend, but that’s it. Actually I told him that before you barged in.”  
Hearing this calmed Arthur down and he sat next to Merlin and even flashed a small smile.“Oh. What did you say to him?”  
Merlin’s heart raced. This was it. An opportunity to tell about his feelings. “I told him that there’s already someone else that I think of”, Merlin said unsurely, meeting his friend’s eyes briefly before looking away. Those few seconds waiting how Arthur would react felt like an eternity. Then he felt a few calm strokes on his arm and looked up to meet Arthur’s affectionate smile. That was when he knew that they truly were on the same page and that his Prince was as overwhelmed by the same emotion as he was.  
“Is it someone inappropriate?” Arthur asked smiling playfully and moved closer to Merlin.  
“Yes. Extremely inappropriate”, Merlin said grinning back. Arthur chuckled and putted his hand around his shoulders. Merlin turned his head when he noticed Arthur leaning closer.  
“I have the same problem”, Arthur said quietly and put his forehead to Merlin’s.  
“I have noticed that”, Merlin smiled. Arthur moved slightly back to see Merlin’s eyes and then embraced him. Merlin closed his eyes and enjoyed the warmth and strength that surrounded him.  
“You know it’s impossible?” Arthur almost whispered sadly to Merlin’s ear. “At least as long as my father is alive.”  
“Yes. I know”, Merlin answered. After a while they slowly drew away. 

Then they got up and continued their day as nothing had happened even though both knew that the undertone of their relationship had changed for good. Merlin was glad because this thing had been hanging between them for quite some time now and he hadn’t been sure any more what was real and what was in his imagination. Now they were finally aware of each others’ feelings, even though they would try to keep things as similar as before. Perhaps their behavior would be somewhat more affectionate than previously, but that would be all. At least for the time being.

***

Gwaine felt heartbroken for a while, but then moved on dating several people before finding a more long-lasting love. Merlin remained as his good friend and they confided in each other. Later Gwaine re-earned Arthur’s respect when he acted bravely during one of Morgana’s attacks and became a knight of Camelot. Merlin couldn’t have been prouder, but he was also secretely jealous of Gwaine’s flowing cape and the authority the title gave him. Merlin had no hope of a promotion, because Arthur wanted to keep him as close as possible, but, after thinking about it, Merlin wouldn’t have had it any other way.


End file.
